Just a few pictures that speak louder than words…
He has been 42 months in the making… On August 7 a few minutes after 2am Henry Lawrence Berry Carnes came into this world healthy and happy. He weighed in at 7 lbs 1oz and is long… 21 & 1/4 inches.
I am overwhelmed by experience of these past few days. One can be mostly prepared for the child birthing experience: reading books, going to classes, planning as a couple. On the other hand there is no preparation for the emotional experience of first holding your own child. It’s only been a few days but I think I love this little boy more everyday than the day before.
Carrie is on maternity leave right now and after her eight weeks of leave I will go on paternity leave. We are both soaking up every minute we can with this little guy before he has to start daycare in mid-November. We both want to say thank you to our churches for being flexible in planning our maternity/paternity leaves. We are so blessed to have these amazing churches.
Carrie and I are pleased to announce that we are (okay, she is) fourteen weeks pregnant. If all goes well, we will welcome our firstborn child into this world in July. Like most expectant parents, I imagine, we are apprehensive as we have loved our freedom and our life together, but we are also excited for the experiences ahead. We have been aunt Carrie and uncle Scott for several years, now, and we have been foster parents to an amazing young lady, and now we endeavor upon a new adventure, together.
My wife and I have been wanting to get pregnant since late last summer. It was frustrating month after month without the results for which we yearned. One morning in February my wife woke me up with the exclamation that she was pregnant. I was glad, but it didn’t seem real. The only indication was a stick with a symbol on it. I waited for it to ‘feel real,’ but the feeling didn’t come, at least right away. I went with my wife to see our OB doctor a few weeks later but wasn’t expecting too much. I had seen many people post those black and white sonogram pictures on Facebook and I have never been able to make out anything that resembles a life-form. My lack of excitement had been a let-down and I expected to be equally underwhelmed by that visit.
My experience at the doctor’s office was very different from what I expected. As the baby became visible on the screen, I was mesmerized. I could actually see the little heart beating! My heart leapt. The doctor put the heartbeat on speaker while she measured it. I could hear and see the incredibly fast thumping of that little heart. My eyes were glued to that screen and when the doctor told us that our baby looked very healthy, so far, and that its heartbeat was very strong, I felt pride and joy all at once: It flooded over me in a totally unexpected way.
New life comes to us in very unexpected ways and seldom on our terms. When we open ourselves to the Holy Spirit we can experience a newness of life: we can experience God in all new ways. But it can be frustrating when it doesn’t happen right away: there have been times that I prayed…fervently…yet I didn’t feel God in the way I expected. But, experiencing God requires us to learn about ourselves and practice faith. Much like those months of trying to become pregnant, It can take some time to experience God more closely way, but, once we are open enough to God it will just happen. And when it happens, you will feel it.
For me, I didn’t experience the joy of new life when I expected to: at that first moment of finding out about the pregnancy. No, I experienced overwhelming joy much later in front of an ultrasound machine. Yes, the joy of new life often catches us unaware. Week after week and month after month I pray that you will go to scripture, join together with other people of faith, worship God, and be in prayer. When we become committed to these practices we will eventually and unexpectedly experience a new life for ourselves and grow in faith and with God.