Joy in Ritual?

My wife and I divide up many of the household chores and share responsibilities, normally, but since my first surgery on February sixth I have been very limited in what I can do. Over the last few months I have not had to put dishes in the dishwasher, do laundry, mow the yard…well, actually, I haven’t had to do anything but sit in a chair and take occasional walks! My normal routines and practices have been interrupted and the longer I go without doing them, the more difficult it is for me to start again.

Yesterday I finally unloaded, loaded and unloaded, again, the dishwasher. This was the first time I’ve done any sort of chore for quite some time. The really embarrassing thing is that it isn’t even a real chore. I mean, if I’d washed dishes in the sink that might be a real chore, but I just rinsed some dishes off and set them in a machine. Yet, this insignificant task seemed horrendous. I put it off all morning until I knew Carrie would be returning from work, and, finally, when I was at the eleventh hour, I went about a task that, in that moment, felt tedious and painfully slow.

How is it that a task could become so difficult when it is a routine I’ve done a million times and never felt particularly burdened (that I can remember). Well…now, to be fair I need to think back to when I first moved out on my own and had dishes to do (and no dishwasher). The dishes often mounted up and it often came down to eating on paper products before I would get around to washing dishes (I was a terrible bachelor).

Perhaps it is in the routine that tasks and ways-of-living become familiar and do-able. Perhaps, in forming a routine, we make a task more personal and intimate and, in doing so, make it tolerable, if not pleasurable.

The first time we make a bed or pick up clothes or change a diaper or run a vacuum… the list is infinite…. The first time or the first few times we do something we are bound to find it more difficult, but the more often we do it, the more it becomes part of our life-ritual, the more easy and familiar it becomes. One of the best examples is exercise, I think. It was easy to motivate myself to go to the gym the first time, but the next few times it was terribly difficult. I got home from work and I already felt exhausted. The last thing I wanted to do was walk over to the gym and wear myself down further, yet, once I got through a week or so of going to the gym, it became a highlight. It wasn’t until it became a ritual that I could enjoy it and I began to look forward to it!

In our lives of faith we have the same issue. If you are a church, synagogue or mosque-goer, then you may recognize this. If you skip worship one week, it is easier to miss it the next, and getting back to your faith practice becomes harder and harder. Prayer is the same way. Perhaps that is why muslims pray so often and methodically. By praying seven times each day they have built prayer into their life-ritual. The prayer becomes both familiar and easy, in a way.

For many, dare I say most, Christians it is more difficult to pray. We don’t have the ritual. Maybe we’ve developed a practice of saying a prayer before a meal or at bedtime, but do we interrupt our day for prayer or does our day follow our prayer cycle? I’d wager for most Christians it is the former!

I think practice is important in all that we do, if we want balanced and healthy lives. During my most recent stay in the hospital, I was feeling very sore in bed. I mentioned it to my physical therapist. She got me out of bed and tried to move my legs, but they couldn’t move more than a few degrees without pain. My muscles were tight from lying in bed all day everyday for so long! My legs were used to walking and bending and running. They were used to a certain practice, but they were out of practice. If any of you have gone to the gym, biked, or run further than you are used to, then you know what I mean. You’ve had the opposite experience as I: you went beyond your usual practice or ritual.

In life we need balance. If we want to start a new faith practice it is important to do so in a measured and responsible way. We should begin praying, reading the bible, or worshipping in a way that is tenable (sustainable). If you’ve not had a regular prayer life, then starting 20 times a day is likely not sustainable as a new practice, but finding one or two times during your day (or even 7?) might be. Finding 10 minutes each morning or evening to read the Bible is more likely to be sustainable, for most people, than trying to read a chapter everyday.

On the other hand, if we drop our habit, even for a day, we risk atrophy. In any of your life-practices, this is good advice I would wager. If you are a person of faith, I especially commend to you that you heed this advice and develop healthy practices. It maybe difficult, at first, but it will grow you, strengthen you, and help you in all of your other facets of life.























Images found at:  http://allwomenstalk.com/ & http://www.thegospelmatters.com/, respectively.

Compelling Care

This is coming from a guy who just paid a guy to cut a hole in his head, so take it for what it’s worth. I may not be the most accurate source of information. Yesterday was a wonderful day. Oh, it was filled with pain and a few tears (don’t ever think you can’t cry), but it was also filled with friends and family.

I think of myself as a pretty independent person. I am usually stubborn enough to think I can get through things on my own, but it turns out that brain surgery is just one example of something I could not get through on my own.

Over the past few days I limited the people who would be with me, wisely, i think, because just my wife, parents and in-laws coming into a room in 2’s and 3’s was overwhelming at times. Yesterday, though, something happened I suddenly had visitors all throughout the day: Brooke Gulledge (my father’s cousin) and her son, Beau; Greg Weeks, the Senior Pastor at Manchester United Methodist Church; my District Superintendent, Leah Pogemiller; and, of course, Rev. Ray and Mrs. Susan Owens.

Each visit wore me out in its own way. Who would have known that lying in bed while people sat in a room could be an exhausting task? I didn’t! I thought I could handle it, and, really I did, I guess, but by the time Ray and Susan came late last night I was still, somehow, glad for this last visit. Carrie asked if I wanted her to turn them away because she could tell I was exhausted, but it was Ray and Susan! I so wanted to speak with them.

My wife, Carrie, wheeled me down to a lounge (my roommate was sound asleep and we didn’t want to wake him) and down the hall in the lounge we were able to have a lovely conversation with Ray and Susan. When I gave them an occasional word-in-edge-wise: apparently that tumor didn’t affect my ability to talk people to death! They told me of the outpouring of prayers, fasting and support that has been widespread across the church. At the 10:45 am worship service I have spoken of “signs of hope” for our church and this is one of them!

How incredible it has been to be surrounded by such prayer and support and I’m very proud of this church and it’s response, but I was thinking. (And that usually gets me into trouble…)

As your pastor, my medical condition has been very public, but how many people do we have in our midst who are suffering without feeling as though they have been thoroughly and overwhelmingly surrounded in prayer? Don’t worry, though, as your pastor I have some suggestions:  (Would you not except me to give you advice?)

  1. We must talk with one another about concerns that we know of: our own and others of which we are aware. We should never do this in a gossipy or negative way, but ask people who have trouble before them,asking, “Can I share this with a caring community of faith!”
  2. We must be willing to be people of fervent prayer. That prayer list in our bulletin is not just a list of names, but list of people who don’t just need a cognitive list of things said about them, but who need to be surrounded emotionally and spiritually.
  3. And, I’ve said this often before, but we need to actually surround one another.  We need to pick up the phone, we need to stop by, and we need to make sure that we have cared physically for one another.

Over the past few weeks the Pontiac First United Methodist Church has done just this! You have surrounded your pastor in love and support and with emotional and spiritual concern, now I ask: How many have suffered silently during this time? Who else can we raise up in prayer. Will this be just a one time out-reach for a public figure in the church or can we ensure that all who walk into this church feel loved and supported just as through they were the pastor?

I know I am putting a large task before you, but I believe this church is up to it!  I’ve watched as new friends have walked through the doors of Aflame Worship and been welcomed affectionately and invited to Bible studies and Sunday Schools.  I’ve watched as other members of the church have been cared for in crisis and new ministries have started for visitation services and grieving.  I have watched as this church has taken the initiative to begin a new “Fruitful Congregations” Initiative.  That means we are leaders in our conference stepping out in faith!  There are signs of hope at this church:  Prayer and compelling care for others will be at the center of our success.  Let us step out in prayer, care and ministry!

Looking Inward.
Yes, this is my MRI from two months ago and that is my tumor.
We still don’t have a proper name for it.

In just a few hours (at noon) I will be undergoing a special MRI.  The doctors are going to be placing small sensors all over my head and doing a scan that will let them see what they are doing during the surgery.  If you’ve ever seen Dr. Shepherd on Grey’s Anatomy doing a TV version of brain surgery, I imagine it will be a lot like that: without all the distractions, sex and death.  This MRI will be loaded into their equipment on Monday morning and they will be able to see what they are doing inside of my head.

What we were not aware of, until Friday, is that these sensors are kind of like green lifesavers.  That’s not the good part.  Wait for it.  They stick them on my head before the MRI at noon on Sunday and I have to keep them on until (and throughout) the surgery.  Okay, I know that in the grand scheme of things that doesn’t seem like such a big deal, but we planned a big dinner out with some of our family Sunday night.  You know, a last nice meal before the surgery.  Now it appears I’ll be going to a nice restaurant in Saint Louis looking like some sort of Star Trek alien.

Well, at least I won’t actually see anyone that I know.  That’s the upside.  Oh- and it’s the Super Bowl, so we’re likely to be alone in the restaurant, so no one may see me anyway!

On a related note I learned something else recently.  One of my mother-in-law, June Berry’s, friends had a brain surgery and had a stressful experience as she was coming out of anesthesia. As she woke up she found that she was being put into an MRI.  You can imagine that it was all very disorienting for her!  It was a very stressful experience and June’s friend wanted me to be warned about it, especially because it was a similar surgery with my same surgeon at the same hospital.  I have good news.  Well, they do it differently now.  This is the cool part:  They now have an MRI right in the operating room so when they are finished with the surgery and I’m still on the operating table (and still knocked out) they will do an MRI right there and then to make sure there is no swelling, bleeding, and to make sure that no part of the tumor remains.

Isn’t it remarkable that we live in an age where my surgeon can scan my brain and see what he is doing as he operates?  Isn’t it remarkable that we live in a time when we can have MRI’s, which were on their own so rare even just two decades ago, right in the operating room?

Anyway, I just wanted to share a quick update. I hope that this note finds my friends and family doing well and I will be praying for all of you!  May God’s blessings be evident o you all on this Sunday morning!

I am especially praying for those of you at First United Methodist Church Pontiac who are working through the Fruitful Congregations material in my absence.  I pray for the Holy Spirit to be upon you all in this discernment process, to show you a way forward, and to build up your passion and excitement for ministry in our church, community and the world!!!

Blessings & Peace!

Scott

The Power of Prayer

Tonight we were watching the movie Stranger Than Fiction.  There is a part of the movie where the narrator says, about Harold Crick, “Harold’s life was filled with moments both significant and mundane, but to Harold, those moments remained entirely indistinguishable, until this moment….”  Significant moments are like that, aren’t they.  Things like surgeries, weddings and births are moments we expect and plan for, yet the extraordinary can’t be planned for.

My wife and I planned our wedding down to the smallest details, yet when I looked into my new bride’s eyes the moment caught me off-guard and filled me with a joy I could not have expected.  I imagine that it is much the same with an expectant parent who has planned the route to the hospital and has a bag packed, but the first moment of holding your child is a moment that knocks you off your feet and makes grown men cry.

An extraordinary moment occurred for me yesterday.  It was in the midst of the mundane and unexpected.  I stopped by the church to finish up a few things.  I had walked in and out of the office at least twice never paying any attention to an innocuous piece of paper on the counter.  Finally my bag was packed, my work was done and I was on my way out the office.  I had walked well-past that piece of paper with names upon it and I would never have seen it, except by chance.

Cheryl, our administrative assistant, called out after me, “Oh, Scott, wait.  I still need [someone]’s phone number.”  I turned and pulled out my cell phone giving her the number and just happened to glance down.  There on the counter top was a piece of paper with names all over it.  At the top it had my name and said “Prayer Vigil.”  Had I been thinking of it or had I been watching the list grow I might not have given it a second thought, but in an unsuspecting moment I was thrown off my feet.  I stared at it and needed a moment before I spoke in disbelief, “This is for me.”  For a moment I thought I might cry as I found myself overwhelmed by this outpouring of love and support.

What prayer will do cannot be known.  It is mysterious that way.  Yet, I know that prayer has very real power.  Yesterday prayer filled me with peace, hope and joy.  Prayer brings communities together and, I believe, helps us to see where God is leading us- when we take time to listen and watch.  And, most importantly, prayer draws us closer to God and helps us make sense of what God is doing in this world.

My sincere hope is that we would not just pray when we see something big headed our way (something we can plan for), but that we would find time for God in the mundane moments of life.  That we wouldn’t just pray in advance of a surgery or impending trouble, but that we would pray in a way that makes us more familiar with God and opens us up to those extraordinary moments when God will knock us over with peace, love and joy.